Have you ever been stopped in your tracks by a rude question or remark? It seems most people have and those people have a great deal to say about those questions.
Recently, I partnered with friend and fellow protocol consultant, Suzanne Nourse, founder and owner of The Protocol School of Ottawa to put a survey together to find out what people felt were the rudest questions they had ever been asked. The survey was separated into categories to include venues like, dating, marriage, illness, death, money, being childless, adoption and more. The responses ranged from short and sweet to rants and raves.
We learned that pregnant women do not appreciate having their “tummy’s” touched by strangers. And asking a “newly” widowed person if they thought they would remarry is often felt to be a huge insult to the memory of their spouse.
Some questions should never be asked like, “how much money do you make?” or “why don’t you have any children?” Those very personal subjects are not the business of strangers or mere acquaintances and should be off limits unless you are very good friends. And even then, some of those questions are inappropriate.
If you are at a loss for words when asked some of these questions you might want to read Peggy Post’s book, “Excuse Me, But I Was Next” or Dr. P.M. Forni’s book, “The Civility Solution” to learn some clever and civilized ways to deal with rude people. Both books would be a valuable addition to any library.
Want to share your experience with rude inquisitors? Comment here. And to fill out the entire survey, email Suzanne Nourse at snourse@etiquetteottawa.com or me, Karen Hickman at karen.hickman@comcast.net and we will send you the survey.
Remember, diplomacy is an art. If in doubt about asking a question…don’t ask.
