Hearing someone offer a wonderful toast is a real treat. It is also, a well honed skill. At some point in your life you will probably be asked to offer a toast to someone. Maybe it will be when you are the best man at your brother’s wedding or the maid of honor for your sister or best friend. Whatever the occasion, being responsible for a toast is an honor that should be taken seriously and done well.So, here are some things to keep in mind regarding toasting etiquette at weddings.

We’ve all heard those party hardy stories that your college roommate regales everyone with at the wedding, and they usually end up causing embarrassment for everyone involved. The time to share those stories is at the bachelor/bachelorette party, if they are shared at all.

I am not sure why some people feel the need to embarrass those that they are toasting. It’s a toast, not a roast. So, here are some tips for offering a great toast at a wedding:

Be prepared. Write out your toast and practice it until you are comfortable delivering it. Practice in front of someone who can offer some good feedback. If need be.

Be appropriate. Make sure whatever you say is appropriate for all of the guests at the wedding, including grandparents. Avoid off color jokes and stories.

Be in control. The time to offer the toast to the bride and groom isn’t after you have had 3 or 4 drinks. You want to have your wits about you and be able to deliver your good wishes with style and grace. Try to avoid falling apart emotionally. That tends to make people uncomfortable.

Be sincere. This is your chance to wish the couple well and say something complimentary and memorable about them. You are helping to launch them into their new life together.

Be brief. A toast should not be any longer than a few minutes. Going on and on for 10 or 15 minutes is too long. The guests are usually waiting to eat at the time of the toast so they are ready for you to move on.

And lastly, be seated.

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